EVERYONE SAID IT WOULDN’T LAST

EVERYONE SAID IT WOULDN’T LAST

Kate Karko, 38 from London, met her husband Tedup while holidaying in India

 

Partway through my design course un London, I decided I needed a holiday. I found a cheap airfare and in 1993 I went backpacking with a friend through Vietnam and on to India.

               We reached Dharamsala, in northern India and made friends with a group of travellers. When they invited us to a party, we agreed. That night, I noticed a young man dancing by the fire. His eyes were closed and his long, dark hair was swirling around him. I was struck by how carefree he appeared.

               When he opened his eyes, he came over to me. @My name is Tsedup.” he said. He told me he was 21 and from Amdo, the eastern province of Tibet. He was born into a nomadic family who lived without electricity or running water and sheltered in a tent made from yak hair. I was transfixed as he talked about riding bareback across the grasslands and watching the hawks swooping through the sky.

               From that night on we were inseparable. We rented a room together and went for walks, talked for ours and swam naked in rock pools. Around Tsedup I felt so alive. I knew this wasn’t a silly crush.

               I was heartbroken when I had to leave eight weeks later. “I’ll come back for you” I promised Tsedup at the airport. Back in Britain I gave up my course and found some secretarial temping work to raise enough money to return to India. My parents thought I’d gone mad, but I had no doubts. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Tsedup.

               Three months later I returned to Dharamasala. As we hugged at the airport I knew I’d made the right choice. Without telling anyone, we went to a register office and got married. It wasn’t particularly romantic, more of a formality. We needed to be wed so Tsedup could return to the UK with me.

               It was another two months before we received the documents that would allow Tsedup to return with me. Before then he was interrogated by High Commission officials and I was warned that he was using me. I understood their concerns but I knew there was nothing fake about our love.

               Finally we arrived back in the UK and rented a flat in Haringey, London. Living in the UK was a complete culture shock for Tsedup. He had never watched television or been on an escalator, but he adjusted amazingly well. I found work as a graphic artist and he did a bit of modelling. We were just happy to be together.

               As soon as Tsedup got his British passport four years later, we planned a trip to his homeland. Tsedup hadn’t seen his family in nine years and it was really emotional to see his mother run towards him with tears streaming down her face.

               In 1999 I discovered I was pregnant. When our son Gonbochab was born we split our time between Tibet and London.

               We haven’t been back to Tibet since 2004, when Gonbocha started school. Last July our second son, DawaJigme (his name means “everlasting moon”) was born, we’re dying o take him back to Tibet and introduce him to everyone. Not bad for a holiday romance that no one thought would last.    

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