I AM SO ASHAMED THAT I DRANK AND DROVE….

I AM SO ASHAMED THAT I DRANK AND DROVE….

My boss and I were working late in the office one night when she suggested we go to her house to continue there. We drank about a bottle and half of wine between us over around four hours and then had a coffee. I didn’t feel remotely drunk, which is why I decided to drive the five miles home. As I was driving I felt fine, although for a split second it crossed my mind that officially I probably was over the limit. But I carried on, thinking I’d be there soon. I got slightly lost and as I was trying to work out where I was, I hit another car. It was and elderly couple in the car and the man immediately called the police.

               I waited about 20 minutes and when the police didn’t turn up, I gave the couple my name and address and left. The police arrived moments later, chased after me and pulled me over. My heart sank. I knew I wouldn’t pass a breathalyser test. Sobbing, I just felt like a common criminal. The worst of it was, this was exactly what I was about to become.

               When we got to the police station, I had to wait in a cell that was bare except for a loo in the corner with no seat. The officer asked me lots of questions and swabbed inside my mouth for DNA, took my fingerprints and a blood sample –which means I’m now on a national register. I was charged with drink-driving and allowed one phone call. Telling my husband was excruciating. He was angry and kept asking why I didn’t get a cab or take a bus – anything but drive. I really didn’t know what to say. What I had done was inexcusable.

               That’s when it really started to sink in. we live in the country and public transport is non-existent. I kept thinking about my mum and the kids. How will my mum get to the hospital for her diabetic checks? How will I do my job? I felt as if my whole world was crumbling.

               I went straight into work the next day and told my boss. She was very understanding, saying she felt guilty, which was ridiculous – she didn’t make me drink. She wrote a fantastic letter to the court about how I couldn’t do my job without a car, but it didn’t make any difference. My husband thought I was totally stupid and had scant sympathy. My mum was very shocked and wanted reassurance that I wouldn’t do it again.

               The wait for my court appearance was awful. I lost a lot of weight and couldn’t sleep. I had a solicitor who was expensive but I hoped that if he could get my circumstances across, the court might take pity on me. I was wrong. The magistrate was a hard – looking woman and I just knew she was going to make an example of me. I got a £500 fine and an 18 months ban. She did suggest, however, I could go on a course called Drive Wise, which would reduce my ban by 25%. There, I learned about the physiological effects alcohol has on your body.

               The worst part was the shame. My confidence suffered and I had to rely on other people to ferry my family around. I kept the truth from everyone except from my mum, my husband, my best friend and my boss. The story to everyone else was that I’d got a speeding ban. I was too embarrassed by the truth.

               I resigned from my job, as it was taking so long to get anywhere on public transport. I felt bad about letting my boss down but we both knew it was for the best. When I got my licence back, I had to pay three times more to get insured and the ban sits on my licence for ten years.

               Now I limit myself to one spritzer if it’s a special occasion, otherwise I don’t drink at all when I’m driving. A second drink-driving conviction can lead to jail. Now that really is a sobering thought.   

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